


I'll Be Yours If You Want Me To

by drunkziall



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-06
Updated: 2015-05-06
Packaged: 2018-03-29 08:55:25
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,986
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3890215
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/drunkziall/pseuds/drunkziall
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>And he thinks that maybe, just maybe there’s a reason that Zayn is here with him and not somewhere else.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I'll Be Yours If You Want Me To

"Finally", Niall breathes out packing his things and shutting of his computer. Niall's been waiting the whole day for the clock to hit five. 

It's not like that there's anything waiting for him at home and it's really something that bothers him very much, but there really isn't anything he can do about it or so he likes to tell himself.  
He grabs his belongings and makes his way out of his office. 

As soon as he felt the cold wind blowing in his face he pulls his beanie further down his face and his scarf further up to his nose. 

The snow is crunching under his feet and he wishes to be home already even though he's still slightly pissed off that the heater decided to break down two days ago and Niall still hasn't had the time to get it fixed. 

He can already hear Liam complaining about it when he's gonna be over the next time, just like he always does. Niall knows Liam only wants the best for him but sometimes it can get on his nerves. 

It's not his fault that his boss always gives him so much work that he doesn't know where left and right is anymore. 

The cold is starting to hurt his hands so he holds them up to his face to blow hot air into them. 

Sometimes he wishes he could quit his job. It's not like he doesn't like it in fact he loves it. He's wanted to do journalism since he was a kid. Niall's always been interested in writing his own stuff and he would love to publish a book of his own one day. But for now he is satisfied with what he has even though his boss is an absolute ass who gives him shit load of work. 

Another thing he wishes is to come home to someone. Someone who's waiting for him so they can cook dinner together and cuddle afterwards on the couch until it's time to go to bed. Someone he can snuggle up to at night when it's freezing. 

"Fuckin' snow", someone mumbles right before Niall walks into them nearly sending them both down to the ground. 

"Oh shit, sorry", Niall says gaining his balance again. "Didn't see you there".

"Yeah, I figured", the boy whispers. Niall touches the boy’s elbow and gripping it lightly before he lets go getting a smile in return.

"Haven't seen you around here before, have I", Niall questions, holding the door to his apartment building open to let them both in. 

"Just moved in", the dark haired boy replies. Every time he looks at him Niall notices his cheeks getting hotter and hotter and suddenly his feet are really interesting for some reason. 

"So I take it you live here, too", he asks just as Niall is asking for his name but goes unheard.

"Um, yeah", been living here for almost two years now", he replies. "M' Niall by the way".  
"Zayn, nice to, uh, meet you, Niall", he answers awkwardly scratching his neck. "I gotta, uh gotta go though". 

He makes his way towards the stairs and hears Niall walking behind him who mumbles something like 'me, too'. 

Niall really hopes that the boy, Zayn, his name is Zayn, doesn't live on his floor. 

They're silent for the rest of their way and as Niall stops at his door Zayn continues walking up the stairs without looking back.

Niall looks after him until he can’t see him anymore. He leans his forehead against his door and groans out loud.

\---

As Niall walks into the meeting room the next morning he can’t believe what he sees. He’s standing there frozen to the ground and staring at Zayn, who hasn’t noticed him, yet. The dark haired boy is looking down onto some notes. 

“Ah, Niall, there you are”, his boss says walking over to Niall who’s still immobile and still staring at Zayn who’s looking up at the mention of Niall’s name. “I was just talking about you to Zayn. He’s our new journalist for literature”.

“Yeah, hello Zayn”, Niall says extending his hand for Zayn to shake. Zayn stands up and shakes his hand and if Niall isn’t mistaken he can see a faint blush on Zayn’s cheek. “Mr. Brice told me sports your thing”.

Niall looks down to their hands and notices that Zayn still hasn’t let go of his hand and it’s kind of comfortable and he knows it shouldn’t be, it shouldn’t feel like Zayn’s hand belongs in his. He retreats his hand hoping he isn’t as red as he feels. “It is, yeah, always been a big fan of all kind of sports”.

“I actually didn’t take you for the sports kind of guy”, Zayn says with a light smile on his lips.

“What makes you think that”, Niall asks not knowing if he should be offended by it or not. “Don’t know what I was thinking, sorry”, Zayn apologizes. And okay this is so not going how Niall wants it to. Last night he imagined how it would be to talk to Zayn and what their first conversation would be about and he definitely didn’t imagine meeting Zayn here at work. 

“Ladies and Gentlemen please take your seat”, their boss says. Unfortunately Niall can’t sit beside Zayn and tries really hard not to pout. He has the strong urge to be as close to Zayn as possible as weird as that is.

“I’d like to introduce to you our new literature journalist, Zayn Malik”, at that Zayn stands up and nods while looking around, his eyes lingering a little longer on Niall. He sits back down and their boss goes into an hour long story about their next issues and Niall can’t help himself but to sneak a few glances at Zayn. 

He looks breathtakingly beautiful and the shy glances he gets in return makes his heart flutter. How is he supposed to concentrate on anything that is said in this meeting when all he can focus on is this gorgeous man in front of him?

After a long, long hour they’re finally dismissed and Niall makes his way to his desk and while doing so he sees that the desk next to him, where Damien sat, is now empty. He doesn’t think too much of it and sits down beginning his work. 

“So, Zayn, this will be your place”, Claire says as she walks over to his place with Zayn in tow. Niall looks up at Zayn’s name and looks down as soon as Zayn’s gaze meets his. “If you have any questions I’m sure Mr. Horan will gladly answer them, aren’t I right Mr. Horan”, she asks fake smiling at him. He really doesn’t like her and she knows it. 

“Yeah, of course”, he brings out and looks back to his work in front of him. She hums in response and leaves. 

“You’ve been working here for long”, Zayn asks still standing in front of Niall and he doesn’t make a move to sit down on his chair to finally start working.

“I’ve been working here for a bit more than three years now”, Niall replies not taking his eyes off of his work. Zayn makes him so nervous and he really can’t concentrate on what he’s writing and the worst is that he has to hand it in; he looks at the clock, fuck, 45 minutes.

He types away as fast as he can, completely ignoring Zayn and therefore missing the disappointed look on Zayn’s face. Zayn sits down and brings everything in place until he’s satisfied and starts his work, occasionally looking over at Niall. 

Right on time Niall stands up with his printed papers and runs off to his boss’s office. He straightens his clothes before he knocks and his boss calls for him to enter.

“Ah, Niall, there you are, I was just about to call you”, he says and Niall walks over and sits down. “I’m so sorry, sir”, he begins and stops as soon as he sees the confusion written on his boss’s face.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, Niall. I just want you to have an eye on Mr. Malik. He’s new and I’m sure he’ll have a few questions here and there and it would be great if you could watch over him for a bit”.

“Oh, uh, yes, of course, sir”, Niall stumbles over his words. His boss is looking at his papers so he hands them over with a smile. “Good, you’ve already finished next week’s articles. Thank you, Niall”.

Niall stands up and walks out of the office and grabs a coffee before he walks back to his desk thinking about what he’s going to do with Zayn. 

As he walks past Zayn he doesn’t acknowledge him. He stands in front of Zayn until he finally gazes up at Niall with a questioning expression on his face. “If you have any question, I’m here for you, yeah”?

“Uh, yeah thank you, Niall. Actually I’ve a question about this”, he says holding up a paper for Niall to see. “Just let me get my chair and I’ll explain it to you”.  
And it is all so easy with Zayn, Niall thinks. He actually listens and is interested in what Niall has to say. They’re laughing together and at some point Niall is clutching his stomach because he’s laughing so hard and as he thinks about it, he doesn’t know when the last time was that he was so genuinely happy. 

“And he really handed it in”, Zayn brings out between his laughter and Niall is nodding his head. “Yeah and of course our boss was not impressed and we all thought he would get fired or something, but no, he’s still here to this day and he’s actually improved his work. He’s one of the best here”.

As their laughter dies down they both realize how close they really are and Niall only has to move his head a few inches forward and their lips would be touching and this overwhelming feeling to do it is too strong so he stands up and grabs his cup. “You fancy a coffee”, he asks waving with his empty cup. Zayn nods his head and Niall is off to the kitchen, glad to get away and to clear his head.

“So you and the newbie, huh”, Niall’s startled and whips around to see Lily standing in the doorway looking at him. “Don’t know what you’re talking about”, he answers as he’s grabbing both mugs to return to Zayn.

“Seems like you two have lots of fun”, she continues. “I’m just explaining the basics, like everyone else would do”. Lily, unfortunately, doesn’t make any moves to let Niall out of the kitchen and he groans internally. 

“It’s okay to fancy him, Niall”, she says with a calm voice. They both have been friends since Niall started working and he knows she only wants the best for him but he doesn’t even know what to think, so how is he supposed to talk about it? “It’s been what, two years, since your last relationship”.

“Yeah, so, I’m still young and that doesn’t mean that I’m interested in every male that crosses path with me”, he says. “Hey, I know, I just thought, because you looked so happy and I haven’t heard you laugh like that in a long time. I just want you to be happy”.

“I know, thank you, but I really have to return to Zayn now. There’s still a lot to get through until we can go home”, he tells her and walks past Lily with a smile on his face that doesn’t reach his eyes.

Back at Zayn’s desk he sees that Zayn’s concentrated on something though he can’t see what, yet. His tongue is poked out at the side of his mouth and his eyebrows are furrowed. “Hey, what you doing there”, he asks startling Zayn who jerks his head up while covering his papers with his hands. “Nothing, was just waiting for you”, he says trying to discreetly shove the paper under his workbook.

Niall nods, knowing full well that’s not the case, but doesn’t want to pressure Zayn, so he lets it slide, for now. He carefully puts the cups down on the table before taking a seat again and goes back to where they left off.

“So I hope that gives you a slight insight of what we’re doing here all day”, Niall utters out as he stands up and makes his way back to his desk. “Yeah, thank you, Niall”, Zayn smiles gratefully. He’s putting everything back in place while constantly looking up at Zayn and finding the other already looking at him and the thing that Niall doesn’t understand is that Zayn doesn’t look away when Niall catches him, he just smiles and Niall flushes every time looking away, a small smile on his face. What is this boy doing to him?

He puts on his jacket and grabs his bag and looks over to Zayn one more time. “Do you walk here, or”, he starts and Zayn is already nodding. “Yeah, I do, so you want to walk together”?

They make their way out of the building and head back to their flats. “Are you from around here”, Zayn asks. “Nah, I’m originally from Ireland and moved here about three and half years ago, just for the job. What about you”?

“I’m from Bradford and just moved here, just for the job as well”, Zayn replies his eyes solely on Niall. Their hands and their shoulders brush each other way too often to be coincidence but neither says anything and they try not to show how much they actually like it and Niall thinks he could get used to this, walking home with Zayn. It’s a change in his black and white life. And he thinks that maybe, just maybe there’s a reason that Zayn is here with him and not somewhere else. 

\---

They make it a habit of going to work together every morning. Zayn knocks on Niall’s door and Niall’s never ready. Always has to still put his shoes on or he isn’t properly dressed for work and is still in his sweats and an oversized sweater. Zayn loves it, thinks that Niall looks really cute and adorable in it and he just wants to hug him and pull him close and never let go but he doesn’t voice his thoughts.

They always grab a coffee from the café a block away, because Niall swears that he can’t survive a work day without his beloved Caramel Hot Chocolate in winter. Makes him always warmer he says and Zayn thinks about all the other things that could keep him warm. He’s always so close to put his arm around Niall or to slip his hand in Niall’s. It’s so freaking cold this winter and Niall complains every morning about his heater being broken and saying that Zayn was relieved when Niall finally told him that he got it fixed is an understatement.

At work they go their separate ways for about an hour or maybe two before one of them goes over to the other for a quick talk and they both ignore the stares they’re getting. Niall knows that almost everyone in the office is talking about them and he really couldn’t care less, just hopes that their boss won’t hear those things, because he knows how frowned upon this is. He tries not to think too much of it, because it’s all rumors and he knows they’re not true, unfortunately. 

When it’s time to go home in the late afternoon they both grab their things and make their way out walking home together. Niall notices that Zayn never smokes in the morning. At first he never smoked in front of Niall at all but one day he pulled one out and asked Niall if he was okay with it and of course Niall is and Niall never knew that smoking could be so hot. He tries not to look at Zayn’s mouth when he sucks in the smoke before he puffs it out. 

That’s their everyday routine and Niall hopes that it’s never going to change. He got used to Zayn’s company and never wants to lose it. 

\---

One weekend Liam’s over at Niall’s for a beer and video games and they’re in a heated game of Fifa and Niall’s about to win when someone knocks on his door. Before he can stop the game Liam scores a goal and screams in victory. 

Niall gets up and walks to the door reluctantly. “You’re going to regret that Liam”, he shouts. When he opens the door he can’t believe what he sees. Zayn’s standing in front of him in his black skinny jeans and a plaid shirt and he looks so gorgeous. He opens his mouth a few times and before he gets anything out Zayn beats him to it. 

“Hey”, he says scratching the back of his head. “I’m cooking and I realized too late that I don’t have any butter left”. At the mention of cooking Niall falls even more for him, because really he can cook, is there anything he can’t do?

“Yeah sure, you want to come in”, Niall asks as he steps aside to let him in and it’s the first time for Zayn to be in Niall’s flat and it’s exactly how he’s imagined it. Niall disappears into the kitchen and Zayn’s about to follow him when he sees someone coming out of what he assumes is Niall’s living room.

Niall returns shortly after. “Liam, this is Zayn, he lives one floor above me and he works with me”, Niall introduces him and remembers that he hasn’t said anything to Liam about Zayn, wanted to keep it to himself a little longer. “Zayn this is Liam my best mate”. Zayn lets out a relieved breath hoping that no one notices.

Niall watches them shake hands. “You want to join us”, Liam asks pointing his thumb in the direction of the living room and before Niall’s brain can process what Liam just said Zayn’s agreed already and is walking with Liam to his living room. I can do this, Niall tells himself. He breathes in deeply and breathes out before he walks after them. 

“I thought you were cooking”, Niall says as he walks in and regrets it instantly as he sees Zayn’s hurt expression. “I didn’t really start so it’s okay, but if you want me to leave that’s okay too”, he offers and is standing up as he says it.

“No, no, stay. I was just wondering”, Niall replies. Zayn’s still standing and not really moving. Liam observes the exchange between the two and is smirking to himself. “You want something to drink”?

“Yeah, whatever you’re having”, he says and sits back down. Niall hears Liam and Zayn talking as he grabs three beers from his fridge. He spends a lot more time in the kitchen than really necessary and after an embarrassingly long time he goes back to them.

He hands the beer over and sits back down on the couch between Liam and Zayn. Niall grabs the controller and hands one over to Zayn. “You want to play”?

“Nah, I want to watch first if that’s okay”, he replies looking at Niall. “Yeah, sure”. Zayn takes a sip of his beer and turns to look at the TV. Liam starts a new game and Zayn finds it really amusing, how much Niall gets into the game. 

After Liam wins again much to Niall’s dismay he lays the controller down beside him and turns to Zayn. “So you’re working with Nialler”, he asks and Zayn’s nodding his head. “Yeah, I moved here about three weeks ago and after I met Niall here in front of the building for the first time it turned out that we’re actually colleagues as well”.  
“So you live together and work together”. Niall coughs violently into his hand. “Yeah, we almost do”, Zayn replies winking at Niall. He leans over Niall to grab the controller of Liam and Niall isn’t sure if that was on purpose. “Niall start the game”.

Niall tries really hard to not be distracted by Zayn but it’s really hard with Zayn’s thigh pressing against his own. He feels the heat there and it spreads in his whole body. Hopefully he’s not as flushed as he feels.

As it turns out Zayn is really bad at playing Fifa and in a moment of bravery Niall throws his arm around Zayn and pulls him close. “You’re not that bad”, he whispers as Zayn nuzzles his head in the crook of Niall’s neck, still pouting. 

“Now it’s my turn”, Liam says breaking their little bubble they were in. He grabs Niall’s controller and sets up a new game. Now Niall has enough time to look at Zayn, to really take him in. He thinks it’s so endearing when Zayn cusses every time Liam shoots a goal. He brings his arm back around Zayn’s shoulder but lets it slip down to Zayn’s waist, squeezing it lightly. At that Zayn turns his head to look at Niall and only then Niall realizes what he’s doing. He empties his beer and stands up much to Liam’s protest. “Niall you’re standing in the way, go away”.

He snatches himself another beer and downs it in one go hoping to forget what just happened before he goes back. Zayn looks up at him as soon as Niall enters the room. Their game is over and of course Liam won again. 

Zayn makes room for Niall again so he sits back down. “So I think it’s better to watch a film now”. Both boys agree and Liam stands up to pick a film. “No way, Liam who says you get to choose a film”, Niall complains. “No one, but I didn’t ask, please be quiet now”.

Liam pops in the DVD without telling them what and sits back down. As the movie begins Niall realizes that Liam chose The Amazing Spiderman and it isn’t that bad. He relaxes and makes himself comfortable on his couch. Sometime into the movie Liam gets up and excuses himself to the bathroom. “So Spiderman, huh”, Zayn says.

“Yeah, I like them, don’t you”, Niall asks. “I actually do, I prefer the original movie though”. Niall sits up straighter and looks at Zayn. “No, Zayn, this Spiderman film is so much better”. Zayn shakes his head before he slings his arm around Niall’s head and ruffles his hair. “Hey, stop that, Zayn my hair”, Niall grumbles but Zayn can hear the smile in his voice. 

They settle back against the couch with Zayn’s arm still around Niall and he thinks he could really get used to this. He doesn’t know why but he feels safe somehow. Zayn actually has him feel all kind of things. He brings his legs under himself and falls more into Zayn’s side, his head moves to Zayn’s shoulder as Zayn pulls him closer by the waist. 

They’re so into the film or in their own little world that they don’t even notice when Liam walks back in. As he sits down, they both move away from each other but it only takes them a minute before they’re back in their previous position. 

After the film ends Zayn retreats his arm from around Niall and stands up. “Have to leave now. Was really nice meeting you Liam and I swear I’m really not that bad at playing Fifa just had a bad day or something”.

“It’s alright mate, was nice meeting you and I’m sure I’m going to see you here more often now”, Liam replies. Zayn and Niall both look at him in confusion and surprise.

“Of course I need a rematch, mate”, Zayn replies before he walks out of the room with Niall close behind.

He opens Niall’s front door and steps out. “Thank you, Niall, hope we can do this again sometime”, Zayn says. “Yeah of course we can, just come over whenever you want”. Niall doesn’t know if he should go in for a hug or not but thinks it couldn’t get any more awkward so he throws his arms around Zayn and pulls him in. Zayn’s hand on the small of his back is really distracting and feels so good like it belongs there and Niall just has to pull him closer, breathing him in. Did he always smell this good, Niall thinks. 

“See you on Monday, Niall”, Zayn says as they pull back. Zayn turns around and walks up the stairs back to his flat. Niall looks after him until he can’t see him anymore. He closes his door and leans his back against it. What is this boy doing to him? As he makes his way back to Liam he realizes Zayn never got anything to eat this evening.

“Why didn’t you mention him before”, Liam asks looking expectantly at Niall. “Don’t know, didn’t think it would matter”, Niall replies. He sits back down and leans his head against the couch and closes his eyes. “Oh, but it does matter”, Liam says. Niall opens one eye to look at Liam seeing that damn smirk so he quickly closes it again.

Niall brings his knees to his chest and buries his face in his knees hoping the ground would swallow him or something. “Hey it’s okay”, Liam reassures him. “I think he likes you, too”.

“I don’t like him like that, Liam”, Niall replies looking up at him. “Oh please”, Liam begins and grabs Niall’s legs and puts them over his and holds onto Niall’s feet. “I’ve seen the way you look at him, Niall, you can’t deny it. Besides your stuttering and the way you blush when he talks to you, hell even when he looks at you, it’s really cute”.

“Shut up”, Niall says and smacks a pillow against Liam’s head. “No, but really, he’s a cool bloke, wouldn’t mind if he’d be around more often”.

“You’re sure it’s not you who fancies him”, Niall questions. “I’m in a happy relationship, but thank you. No seriously invite him over more often. I’m sure the others will like him as well”, Liam responds. 

Niall thinks about it and he’s not really sure if he’s ready to share Zayn with everyone.

\---

Zayn and Niall make their usual way to the café to grab their drinks before they’re on their way to work. Zayn still hasn’t said anything about the weekend and it really worries Niall, makes him thinking if he should ask Zayn or not.

“Penny for your thoughts”, Zayn says brushing his elbow against Niall’s. He turns his head and shakes it while shrugging his shoulders. “It’s nothing”, Niall replies. He takes a sip from the cup and before he can think any more about it he just brings it out. “So, we had loads of fun on Saturday and I was wondering, uh, we were wondering, or Liam asked if you maybe want to go to the pub with us on Friday. We do it every two weeks. We meet up with Louis and Harry and enjoy a beer or two. Think it would be cool if you’d come along. Only if you want of course”, he stops talking when he hears a chuckle from Zayn. Niall looks at him from the corner of his eyes not daring to fully look at him. To his surprise Zayn takes his hand and squeezes it and lets go as he feels Niall tense. Zayn’s smile drops. 

“I’d love to come with you, Niall”, Zayn mumbles. Niall beams at him and throws his arm around Zayn pulling him close into a side hug. Zayn slings his arm around Niall and Niall thinks he could get used to this. Zayn’s arm around him feels really, really nice and makes him feel warm and his heart flutter.

“Just by the way I’m really not that bad at playing video games”, Niall looks at him with raised eyebrows. “I’m not really sure about that, mate”, he squeezes Zayn’s waist and winks at him. 

“I’ll prove it next time I’m over. I just haven’t played in a while is all”, Zayn says knocking his head lightly against Niall’s. “Is that just an excuse to spend more time with me”?

“Yeah, you caught me, I just want to spend time with you all the time”, Zayn replies laughing and Niall isn’t sure how honest he is, but it makes him feel some kind of way.

\---

Saying that Niall is nervous would be an understatement. As soon as he got home Friday afternoon he jumped into the shower and afterwards he stood in front of his wardrobe longer than really necessary and he tried to tell himself that he didn’t do this all because of Zayn. 

Now he’s sitting in the kitchen nervously biting his thumb nail, contemplating what could go wrong this night. He hopes, no prays that Louis and Harry won’t tell any embarrassing stories about him. They have a bad habit of doing so and he’d really like for Zayn to come around more often. He’d actually really like it if Zayn would be around every minute of every day.

He’s pulled out of his thoughts when he hears a knock on his door. He stands up and tugs at his clothes, one last look in the mirror, before he opens the door. Niall feels like a teenage girl who has her first date and this isn’t even a date, unfortunately.

Zayn’s standing in front of him, beautiful as ever, it actually takes his breath away. “Hey”, he murmurs. “Hi”, Zayn says casually leaning against Niall’s door frame. “Ready to go”, Niall grabs his jacket and his keys and then he’s out of his door and on his way to the pub with Zayn. He can’t believe it and tries not to freak out.

“The lads are really looking forward to meeting you”, Niall begins as they make their way downstairs. Zayn holds the door open for Niall who blushes, ducking his head hoping Zayn doesn’t see the faint blush on his cheeks. “I can’t wait to meet them”.

“They can be a bit much at times”, Niall explains. “I didn’t need to know that”, Zayn laughs nervously and Niall loves his laugh. How his eyes crinkle and how he throws his head back. “It’s not that bad, honestly, just wanted you to know”.

“Not so sure about that, mate”, Zayn replies.

As they walk into the pub Niall immediately spots them in the corner of the pub. He tugs at Zayn’s arm and walks them over. Three pair of eyes is staring at them and at Niall’s hand that still firmly holds Zayn’s arm. 

Niall lets go flushing again and he really curses himself for being so pale. “Hey lads, this is Zayn”, he introduces Zayn who raises his hand and waves at them. “Zayn this are Harry and Louis”.

“Hey buddy”, Liam’s smiling brightly at him. “How do you know him already, Liam”, Louis asks fake offended. “As I told you before he played video games with me and Niall last weekend”.

“Ah right I remember the Sunday afterwards where Niall texted us about it”, Louis answers and Niall really hopes that he is going to shut up now. “Should have read that mate, he didn’t shut up about you”.

“Is that so”, Zayn asks smirking at Niall as he takes a seat. Niall shakes his head and moves to the bar. He really does need a beer like right now. He walks back to their table and sets the pints down and sits himself next to Zayn. 

As he listens to Louis going on about a story that happened about three years back he zones out and hopes the night won’t drag on. Fortunately Louis stops talking about embarrassing things and tells Zayn about all the things he’s done and achieved so far in his life and Niall thinks this could become a regular thing. 

After Louis is done he asks Zayn all sorts of questions, how he got into journalism and what he wants to do in the future. As Zayn answers Louis Niall feels a warm hand on his thigh. He looks at Zayn who doesn’t even flinch. Zayn’s still talking and looking at Louis but he’s squeezing Niall’s thigh when he feels his eyes on him. His hand is burning on Niall’s thigh.

Niall is so close to blanket Zayn’s hand with his own but he’s afraid that would overstep the boundaries but then again what Zayn is doing is something that just friends don’t do. So before he can think too much about it he lifts his hand from the table and brings it under the table to place it on Zayn’s. Zayn turns his hand and entwines their fingers. 

After some time Louis and Harry excuse them and make their way to the dance floor and the remaining three can’t help but laugh at the antics of Louis and Harry. They make a fool out of themselves and it’s refreshing. Niall’s felt so on edge the entire day not knowing how well Zayn would fit in and as it turned out Zayn fits right in and Niall can’t swipe the smile off his face. 

He’s even considering to join them but then he would have to let go of Zayn’s hand and that was a compromise he wasn’t ready to accept. So he stays talking with Liam and Zayn about everything and nothing until he thinks it’s time for him to go home. He notices the slight buzz he has from the alcohol he’s consumed that night and his bed is really calling him. 

Niall tells them as much and Zayn gets up with him ready to leave and it leaves a pleasant feel in Niall’s belly that Zayn is leaving with him. “I had a really great night Liam. I hope we’ll do this again sometime”, Zayn says.

“Yeah definitely”, Liam agrees. “It’s really great that you could make it”. Niall looks to the boys on the dance floor who are engrossed in their dancing that Niall doesn’t want to disturb him. “Tell them bye for us, will you”?

“Will do”, Liam replies.

They make their way out of the crowded pub and walk back to their flats through the cold. Niall really hopes that spring will come soon. He’s so done with the cold. 

“Your friends are really nice”, Niall’s pulled out of his thoughts and looks at Zayn. “They really are and they really like you”. His fingers start to get numb and his pockets really aren’t made to keep them warm. 

“They do”, Zayn asks and Niall nods his head. Zayn takes his hand when he notices Niall’s shivers “So you think I left a good first impression”?

“I’m pretty sure you can’t leave a bad one, to be honest”, Niall laughs nervously. “Good to know”, Zayn winks at him and it makes Niall’s knees weak. Thankfully they’re not far from their flats now. He’s not sure how much more he can take before he passes out. 

Zayn walks him to his door and waits for Niall to get in. “I had a really great evening”, Niall says leaning against his door. “So did I”, Zayn whispers. “I would like to do it again soon”.

“I think that can be arranged and I’m pretty sure the boys will want to see you again as well so”, Niall replies and he’s not sure what he’s supposed to do now so he wishes Zayn a good night and walks into his flat and closes the door. His heart is beating rapidly.

\---

It becomes a regular thing for Zayn to join them. Whether it is at the pub or when either of the boys is over at Niall’s. It actually comes to the point where Zayn is sure he can call them his own friends now. He spends time with them without Niall being there and Louis and him text constantly.

\---

Niall had a really hard week at work and he’s so happy to be finally home Friday afternoon. He changes into his sweatpants and makes himself something to eat before he makes himself comfortable on his couch. As the time goes on he notices how quiet it is. It never really bothered him, because it’s normal to be this quiet when you live alone but now he couldn’t stand it.

And he is really missing Zayn even though he saw him about three hours ago. It leaves an unpleasant feeling deep inside of him. He grabs his phone from the table and the keys from the hook by the door and makes his way upstairs. 

He knocks on the door and it takes sometime before a surprised Zayn opens the door. Niall looks at him sheepishly. “I, um, I was really bored and I thought that maybe, you know, I could come over to yours and um”, he stumbles over his explanation. Zayn just grins at him and opens the door wider to let him in. 

Zayn leads Niall into his living room and as Niall looks around he notices that it looks exactly like he imagined it. It’s tidy, of course it is, and Zayn has lots of books. Niall realizes it’s the first time for him to be at Zayn’s and it feels weird and he thinks why hasn’t he been here before? Though it might feel a bit weird it actually feels a bit like home. He wouldn’t mind living here. 

“I was just about to watch a film before you knocked on the door”, Zayn says gesturing with his hand to the couch for Niall to sit down. “You don’t mind me joining you, do you”, Niall asks bashfully. 

“Of course not”, Zayn says. “You want something to drink”? Niall settles down on the couch and replies that a coke would be nice. So Zayn grabs them both a coke and sits back down on his couch next to Niall. 

He presses play and leans back enjoying Niall’s company. They’re silent watching the film and sometime during the film Zayn notices that Niall’s shivering a bit so he snatches the blanket that hangs over the armrest. Zayn puts it over them and Niall smiles gratefully at him. Niall moves a bit closer to Zayn so he lifts his arm and Niall lays himself against his side and gets back to watching the film. 

Zayn’s hand is running up and down his arm before it settles on his waist. Due to Niall’s movement his shirt rid up and Zayn’s hand sneaks completely under his shirt and caresses his waist, his thumb drawing soothing circles into his skin. 

A while later just before the films coming to an end Niall falls asleep on Zayn. He watches him for quite some time nearly cooing at Niall. Zayn thinks Niall’s so peaceful when he sleeps and doesn’t want to wake him so he lifts the blanket and lays it beside him. He then scoops Niall up in his arms and walks him to his bedroom. 

He puts him down and tucks him in. Zayn walks back out and makes himself ready for bed before he joins Niall. He grabs a blanket from his dresser and lies down beside Niall. Oh what he would do to cuddle Niall right now. He falls asleep to the thoughts of having Niall in his arms while he falls asleep.

When Niall wakes up the next morning he doesn’t know where he is. He looks around squinting his eyes at the brightness. Niall opens them slowly again and looks around and a few seconds later it dawns on him that he’s in Zayn’s bedroom though he doesn’t know how he got there and there was no sight of Zayn. 

He gets up and walks out of the bedroom and makes his way to Zayn’s kitchen and sure enough there Zayn is standing at the stove. Niall walks in further and leans against the kitchen counter watching as Zayn makes pancakes. 

“Good morning”, Zayn beams at him. “Good morning”, Niall replies. “Did you carry me to bed Zayn”?

“Yeah, you fell asleep on me and I didn’t have the heart to wake you up so I carried you to bed. I hope that doesn’t bother you”, he places a pancake on top of the other and turns off the stove.

“No it doesn’t but it would have been nice if you had stayed with me. I woke up in a foreign bedroom”, Niall says and walks over to the set table and takes a seat. He takes a pancake and begins to dig in. “Noted”, Zayn replied. “Next time I’ll stay with you”.

This makes Niall’s heart stutter, next time, he really hopes there’s a next time and he thinks he really wouldn’t mind if it happened a little different.

“These are really good, think I might’ve to come over more often”, Niall says. Zayn looks up meeting Niall’s gaze. “I won’t mind”.

“Can’t believe it’s Sunday already”, Niall complains. “Where’s the weekend gone”?

“Hey, don’t ruin my weekend, it’s Sunday morning, so it’s still weekend”, Zayn brings out holding his knife up and glares at him playfully. “I can’t believe you’re one of those people who waste their weekends by thinking about work on a Sunday”. 

“Oh shut it”, Niall says before he erupts into laughter. Zayn looks fondly at him, thinking that this is what he’s missing, someone he can have playful banter with as well as serious conversation. 

A while later Niall leaves Zayn’s flat with the promise of Zayn to come over later for a rematch of Fifa and as he’s walking down the stairs thinking about last night he thinks that he really is in love with Zayn Malik and there is nothing he can do about it.

\---

After that they spend even more time together now. Either of them is always over at the others flat. They part ways after work for maybe an hour or two before one of them knocks on the door of the other. 

It doesn’t take them long before there really isn’t any time where they are apart. Zayn picks Niall up in the morning, when Niall hasn’t stayed over at Zayn’s or vice versa, they then walk to work and after that they walk back home and either cook together or order take out and more often than not they fall asleep at the others flat or are just too tired to get back to their flats and somehow their clothes found home in each other’s wardrobe.

And it takes Liam to point out that the two of them are practically living together and Niall tells himself that he’s going to tell Zayn soon how he’s feeling. He tells himself that every night when Zayn’s arm is slung around him pulling him close.

\---

On Monday evening Niall makes his way upstairs to Zayn. The two of them haven’t had much time for each other the whole day with Niall being in his boss’s office most of the day and he even had to stay for over an hour more. As he rounds the corner he sees something he isn’t prepared for. 

Zayn is kissing someone his arms on either side of the other’s head and hands are roaming all over Zayn’s torso before slipping under Zayn’s shirt at that he lets out a low grunt. 

Niall backs away slowly first connects with the wall, luckily unheard, before he runs down the stairs two at a time. He slams the door shut behind him and slides down to the ground tears escaping his eyes. He thought they’re on the same page, that Zayn maybe is feeling the same way that he is.

As his crying dies down a bit to little hiccups he gets up from the floor and walks to his bedroom laying down not having the strength to get out of his clothes.

He tosses around until late into the night before he finally falls asleep too exhausted to cry anymore. Niall doesn’t sleep for very long before he wakes up again. His eyes feeling dry like sandpaper and they feel really swollen. He looks at his clock and it’s only 5 in the morning. Niall groans and lies back down and he thinks of the night before tears threatening to fall down once again. How could he think for just one second that someone like Zayn would want someone like him?

Deciding that it’s best to get up before his tears start falling again he showers before he eats some breakfast, though he’s feeling really ill having the feeling to throw it back up again, he forces some down before properly getting dressed for work, long before he normally would leave.

He gets some confused looks thrown his way when he walks into the building none of them used to seeing Niall alone since Zayn’s first day. Some of them give him a pitiful look and if he wasn’t so exhausted he would say something but he’s afraid to open his mouth, afraid that he’s going to cry again. Is this how it feels to have your broken he thinks bitterly as he walks to his desk?

Niall actually gets a lot of work done before Zayn walks in and heading straight over to Niall. He can see how the worried looks falls from his face and a smile takes its place instead. “Why are you here already”, Zayn asks and Niall shrugs his shoulders before replying. “Have so many things to do today so I thought I’d come here early”. He doesn’t take his eyes off the computer screen. “But you didn’t tell me. You know I’d have come with you this morning”.

“No it’s okay”, Niall answers still typing though he’s not really sure what he’s writing at this point. His vision starts to get blurry again. “Okay but you’re going to leave with me this afternoon, right”. 

Niall finally tears his eyes away from the screen and looks at Zayn. “I’m afraid not, mate”. 

“Niall, really, what is wrong”, Zayn sighs. “Don’t know what you’re talking about. I have work to do”, he says and Zayn realizes that this conversation is over for now. He walks over to his place and starts working, throwing worried glances Niall’s way every so often and Niall is annoyed beyond believe.

But Zayn knows better than to walk over again that day. He stays where he is until it’s time to go home. Niall hasn’t moved from his chair the whole day. “Nialler you coming”, Zayn asks and Niall can hear the hopefulness in Zayn’s voice. “Nope, still haven’t finished this. You can go though. I think it’s going to take me another hour or so”. Zayn doesn’t believe him and Niall knows it, can see it in Zayn’s eyes, but he’s glad that Zayn doesn’t say anything. He nods his head. “See you tonight, yeah”. Niall gives him a curt nod before he’s typing again. 

Niall leaves an hour later than Zayn and as he walks out of the building he thinks about what he can do before he goes home. He knows that Zayn will come around at some point tonight and he really can’t take seeing him at the moment so he goes over to Liam’s, pretending that everything is fine, though Liam can see right through him.

“So what’s up”, he asks after Niall has downed his second beer. “All good”, Niall replies grabbing his third beer from the fridge. “It’s about Zayn, isn’t it”?

“It’s always about Zayn”, Niall replies while opening his beer. “And what is it this time. Usually you’re different when you talk about him”.

“He’s fucking other people. That’s what is”, Niall replies laughing to himself before drinking another huge gulp of his beloved beer that seems like it’s the only thing that can help him at the moment.

Liam’s face changes from confusion to something that Niall can’t really read and he hopes it’s not the pity thing because this is enough already. “Oh, um, okay, I wasn’t expecting that”.

“Yeah, neither was I”, Niall replies sitting back down next to Liam. “I was about to tell him. I’ve had everything planned out and then I see him with someone else. Liam, I thought that maybe just maybe he’s feeling the same but I was wrong and it hurts so much, so fucking much”. He doesn’t know when he started crying but Liam is there and pulls him into his arms. “Hey, maybe he thinks the same way that you do. I’m pretty sure he likes you, too, but maybe he thinks that you’re not feeling the same as him”.

“But I do”, Niall says between his crying hiccups. “I know, I know”, Liam whispers. “But maybe that’s his way of dealing with things”.

“Then it’s a really shitty thing of him to deal with things”, Niall says curling himself even more into Liam. “Can I stay here for the night”?

“Of course you can”, Liam answers holding Niall close to him. “Thank you Liam”, Niall mumbles before he falls asleep in Liam’s arms.

\---

He’s going to work later than usual. Having to stop by his apartment to shower and change into new clothes and making sure that Zayn had already left for work. Niall walks past him pretending to text someone on his phone and Zayn lets him. 

Two hours later Niall walks to the kitchen to fetch himself another cup of coffee. He presses some buttons and leans against the counter to wait for his coffee. Zayn walks in and closes the door behind him. “Okay what the hell is wrong? Did I do something”, he asks and Niall sees the dark circles under his eyes. Maybe he’s feeling as bad as Niall is. Before he can open his mouth Zayn talks again. “And don’t say it’s nothing because we both know it’s a fucking a lie. You’ve been avoiding me”.

“You know how much work I have to do”, Niall says but Zayn just shakes his head walking over to Niall. Now he’s much too close for Niall’s liking. “Tell me”, Zayn whispers. Niall looks up into Zayn’s eyes and he can feel Zayn’s hands on his hips and it leaves an unwelcoming feeling on his hips, it burns where Zayn’s hands are and it burns behind his eyes and he feels his eyes watering. 

“Hey, hey, what is it”, Zayn asks tenderly when Niall lets the tears fall down. Zayn brings a hand up to brush the tears away. Niall shakes his head. “You know you can tell me everything right”. He’s nodding his head now. Before Niall knows what he’s doing he falls into Zayn’s arms and Zayn is there, he holds onto him saying sweet nothings in his ear and rubs his back softly. 

Their moment is interrupted when they hear voices outside. Niall grabs his coffee and makes his way back to his desk and Zayn lets him.

When Zayn packs his bag to leave that afternoon he just looks at Niall who is avoiding his gaze though he feels Zayn’s eyes on him, has felt them on him the whole day. 

An hour later he’s alone in the office and can’t concentrate on his work anymore. So he walks over to Zayn’s desk and looks at the picture of the two of them that hangs right beside Zayn’s computer screen and he smiles as the memories come back. They’ve known each other for maybe two weeks and Zayn insisted on a picture of the two of them. Niall’s looking into the camera but Zayn’s looking at him, smiling fondly at a laughing Niall. He lets his gaze wander around Zayn’s desk when he sees something poking out of Zayn’s maps. 

He picks it up and opens it and what he sees inside makes his insides churn. Zayn’s drawn him and not just once but multiple times. There were pictures of him in all kinds of things they’ve done together. This breaks his heart even more. He places it back and leaves the building more confused than ever.

\---

Nothing has changed by the end of the week. Niall is still avoiding Zayn and it seems like Zayn accepts it. He doesn’t make any attempts at talking to Niall. He looks over at Niall more often than not but that’s it and somehow it makes Niall even angrier. Niall wants Zayn to be a bit more persistent.

Coming Friday Niall finds himself at the pub, he made even sure that Zayn wasn’t coming and his friends promised that he wouldn’t, but he should have known better. He’s just emptied his first beer when Zayn walks in. Niall looks at Liam who looks apologetically at him. “He’s our friend, too”.

“Just because you can’t get your shit together doesn’t mean that we’re going to choose between you two”, Louis says. Zayn’s at the bar ordering his drink and Niall doesn’t take his eyes off him. “Just tell him you want to suck his dick. I’m pretty sure he won’t mind. I think he’d be ecstatic”.

“Shut up, Louis”, Niall grumbles watching Zayn making his way over to them who yet has to look at Niall. Zayn sits down opposite of Niall and all he can think is how breathtakingly gorgeous Zayn is. 

About two hours later Niall feels the buzz of the alcohol and before he knows it he’s on the dance floor dancing to a song he doesn’t recognize. He’s too busy grinding with this insanely hot stranger behind him. Niall’s lost track of time, all he knows is that this feels good and this is what he needs to forget. 

The hands on his hips leave his and before he has time to turn around someone takes the place from the stranger. They grab his hips rather harsh so he turns around and looks at a flustered Zayn. He’s about to open his mouth but closes it when Zayn shakes his head. Niall turns back around and places his hands on top of Zayn’s and grinds his ass into Zayn’s crotch. Zayn lets out a choked of moan. This has Niall grinning. Zayn presses his lips to Niall’s neck and lets them rest there while Niall continues to tease Zayn. His hot breath is fanning over Niall’s neck making him feel hotter than he already feels. Suddenly Zayn turns him around. 

Niall looks up into Zayn’s dark eyes lets his gaze wander over Zayn’s features. He doesn’t know how much time has passed. Maybe seconds, minutes or hours, he’s not really sure, too lost in Zayn’s eyes. He thinks Zayn’s trying to tell him something by just looking at him though he’s not sure, that may be the alcohol talking. 

He’s not sure who leaned in first but he doesn’t care as he finally, fucking finally feels Zayn’s soft lips pressed against his own. Niall’s been waiting so, so long for this. He feels Zayn’s tongue against his lips softly nudging them open and he lets him, wanted to feel Zayn like this for longer than ever. Niall lets his hands wander up higher from Zayn’s neck to his hair and tugs at them. Zayn lets out a soft groan pressing himself even closer to Niall with his hands slipping down to Niall’s ass.

Zayn presses short kisses against Niall’s lips before he pulls away completely resting his forehead against Niall’s, panting. Niall closes his eyes and he feels dizzy like everything is spinning around him. He pulls away from their embrace and all but runs to the bathroom and makes it just in time to the toilet to empty his stomach. Tears start falling down his face while he’s still dry heaving into the toilet.

He feels a hand on his back and he really wishes it isn’t Zayn but of course it is him. Zayn’s hand comes up to his back and he rubs his back until Niall leans away from the toilet. Zayn hands him tissues and Niall’s really grateful for Zayn being there for him. He falls into Zayn’s arms exhausted. They sit there for a while, Zayn whispers something in his ear that Niall can’t make out. All he hears is his blood running through his veins. But it’s soothing and his eyes start to droop. 

When Zayn feels Niall go limp in his arms he shakes him lightly and helps him up and they make their way slowly back to their table. Zayn grabs their belongings and tells Liam that they’re leaving, his arm still around Niall holding him up who tries not to fall asleep again.

Back at Zayn’s flat he helps Niall into bed, untying his shoes, pulling his jeans off and tugs him into bed. He walks out of his bedroom and comes back with a bucket that he places next to his bed, some water and aspirin that he leaves on the nightstand for Niall when he wakes up in the morning. Niall’s so close to falling asleep, he has a hard time to force his eyes to stay open. 

When Zayn makes his way to his door Niall sits up a bit, feeling dizzy again and holds his stomach. “Please stay”, he mumbles lying back down. His head is pounding and he really doesn’t want Zayn to leave. Zayn sighs but closes the door and takes his clothes off before he climbs in behind Niall. He takes Niall into his arms and Niall falls asleep quickly to Zayn’s steady breathing. 

Niall wakes up to a pounding headache. He groans and hides his head under the pillow trying to block out the light that comes through the shitty blinds. It takes him a moment to realize where he is. He lifts the pillow and looks around and sees that he’s in Zayn’s room and Zayn is of course nowhere to be seen though the place where he lay is still warm. A smile spreads across his face before it slips when he thinks about the night before. Oh god, he had to puke after he kissed Zayn. 

He buries his face in his hands and groans out loud. But Zayn went home with him and slept beside him. He fell asleep in Zayn’s arms again and he fucking kissed him last night. Niall takes the aspirin and empties the water glass before making himself comfortable again. He thinks he won’t leave anytime soon. 

Zayn walks in with two steaming mugs in his hands. He closes the door with his foot and smiles at Niall. “How are you feeling”, he asks softly holding the mug out for Niall to take who grabs it thankfully. Zayn sits down on his bed and sips from his tea. “Could be worse I think”, Niall mumbles into his mug, blowing on it before taking a sip. “Think I should feel a lot worse by all the drinking that I did last night”.

“Yeah you reckon”, Zayn’s grinning and Niall puts the mug on the nightstand and pulls the blanket over his head embarrassed. Zayn puts his mug beside Niall’s and grabs the blanket and pulls it back. “Hey”, Niall whines. “What”, Zayn asks. “It’s not fair. You can’t just hide from me now. I took care of you last night”. He actually juts his bottom lip out and Niall finds it endearingly cute. 

Niall starts laughing and stops abruptly when Zayn lifts the blankets and gets under it as well lying on top of Niall. “Don’t think this is a good idea”, Niall says as Zayn entwines their hands beside Niall’s head. “My stomach’s still a bit weak to be honest”. At that Zayn switches their positions so Niall’s on top now. “Better”, Zayn asks holding onto Niall’s hips. Niall leans on his elbows looking down at Zayn nodding his head. 

He tucks his head in the crook of Zayn’s head and falls back asleep his coffee long forgotten.

\---

That night didn’t really change anything between the two of them. It took them some time before they were back to ZaynandNiall. They’re tiptoeing around each other and the other three hate them for that. 

Niall and Zayn haven’t brought up the kiss at any point. But they spend all their time together again. Like right now. Zayn’s over at Niall’s and they’re cooking together. 

Zayn chops the vegetables and Niall does the rest because they both know they will be better off that way. “Zayn, seriously what are you doing”, Niall chuckles walking over to Zayn.

“What”, he asks. “I’m not doing anything wrong”. Niall takes a knife and bumps his hip against Zayn’s to get more room. “You do it like this”, Niall says though Zayn has only eyes for Niall. “Yeah, like this”, Niall says and looks up at Zayn who quickly looks away. “You’re not even looking”, Niall complains nudging his elbow against Zayn’s side. “I am looking”, Zayn replies, a wide smile on his lips.

Zayn leans his head a bit closer and his eyes flick from Niall’s eyes to his lips and back up to his eyes. “Yeah, um, you do it like that”, Niall says and sets the knife aside and walks back to the stove, his heart beating rapidly. 

“Can I help you with anything else”, Zayn asks a few minutes later when he’s chopped everything. He places the cutting board beside the stove and stands really close beside Niall looking into the pot. 

“Nah, thank you”, Niall replies and takes the cutting board and puts the chopped vegetables into the pot and stirs it. “We can set the table in a bit, I think”, Niall replies not taking his eyes off the pot. “Okay”, Zayn lets out and leans against the counter watching Niall. 

“I’m glad you’re here”, Zayn says. Niall’s startled and nearly lets the spoon fall into the pot. “Yeah haven’t done it in ages”, Niall replies avoiding Zayn’s gaze. “I, um, I need the toilet”, he says. “Can you take over”, and as soon as Zayn has the spoon in hand Niall flees to the toilet. His heart is beating so fast he thinks he might pass out. He splashes some water into his face before he leans his hands on both sides of the sink and looks at himself in the mirror. He hasn’t been this nervous in such a long time and he doesn’t know how to handle this situation. 

He walks back out and Zayn looks up as he enters the kitchen and smiles at him. Niall leans against the counter watching Zayn. He places his hand on the counter near Zayn’s so they’re nearly touching. Zayn looks at his hand and moves his own ever so lightly closer to Niall’s so they’re almost touching and Niall really wants to place his hand under Zayn’s and let them intertwine but something’s stopping him. Just as Zayn’s pinkie brushes his he pulls his hand away. “I’m going to set the table”, he mumbles and moves to the cupboard.

“We should do this more often, Niall”, Zayn says setting his fork down to take a sip of his water. “Totally agreed”, Niall replies around a mouthful of food. “We make a good team”, Zayn brings out and Niall nods his head. “We are. You want to watch a film after we cleared the table”.

“I’d love to but I can’t”, Zayn answers and they both know it’s a lie but Niall nods anyway. When they’re finished Niall stands up and puts their plates together and puts them in the dishwasher. Zayn follows him and after everything’s back to where it belongs Zayn grabs his jacket that he hung over the chair and puts it on while walking to the door. He opens it and turns around to Niall. “Was really a great evening”, he says scratching the back of his neck. 

“Definitely was, should do this again soon”, Niall leans against the door frame looking at Zayn. “Too bad it’s over already”. Zayn takes a step towards Niall and presses a short kiss to his cheek before he makes his way up the stairs to his flat leaving a flustered Niall behind.

\---

Niall notices that something is changing. Their touches linger a tad too long and they touch more than usual and he really tries not to read too much into it, doesn’t want to get his hopes up too high. 

Zayn’s currently over at Niall’s making himself comfortable on his couch after a long day of work. They’ve finished dinner not too long ago and Niall joins him as Zayn’s zapping through the channels and stops on a discovery channel.

“You’re not serious, are you”, Niall asks trying to take the remote as Zayn nods his head and turns up the volume. “I am”, he responds as he holds the remote out of reach. “No, Zayn, come on”, Niall whines sitting back down. Niall waits for a while before he reaches forward and takes the remote out of Zayn’s hand. He holds his hand high into the air and Zayn lets himself fall to the side and Niall falls with him. Zayn leans in, his head only inches apart from Niall’s. He looks from his eyes to his lips and back up and just as Niall leans in Zayn takes the remote out of his hand and starts laughing. 

“That’s not fair, you fucker”, Niall complains slapping Zayn’s chest and tries to move off of Zayn but Zayn wouldn’t have any of it and grabs Niall’s hip with his free hand. “Zayn”, Niall drags out. Zayn lets the remote fall somewhere beside him and places his other hand on Niall’s hip as well. Niall places his hands on either side of Zayn’s head and watches as Zayn licks his lip, he mimics his action without realizing it. Niall leans in again while making sure that this is what Zayn wants and he sees a slight nod from Zayn and presses his lips first lightly and then more persistently against Zayn’s. 

Zayn lets out a satisfying sigh before he deepens their kiss and meets Niall’s tongue. Niall lets his hand travel under Zayn’s shirt, stroking his fingers over Zayn’s happy trail before his fingers make their way up his torso and he rests his hand on Zayn’s ribs. 

Niall is rid of his shirt before he knows it and feels Zayn’s cold hands all over his body leaving goose bumps on its way. He starts nibbling down Zayn’s neck before he licks his way back up and bites lightly just under his jaw. Zayn groans out Niall’s name arching his body up into Niall’s trying to get the friction where he so badly needs it. 

His mouth finds Zayn’s again as he starts rocking his groin into Zayn’s cursing as he does. Niall trails kisses to Zayn’s earlobe where he takes it between his teeth hearing Zayn hiss. His tongue licks over it soothingly. 

He tucks Zayn’s shirt down to kiss along his collarbones after grazing his teeth over it. Niall takes Zayn’s shirt in his hand and pulls it over Zayn’s head and throws it to the ground on top of his own shirt. He leans back down to kiss Zayn again and feels their naked chests pressed up against each other and it feels so good already. 

“I think we should take this somewhere else”, Zayn gets out as Niall kisses down his chest sucking on his nipple. Niall hums in agreement but doesn’t move. He noses along Zayn’s happy trail and bites his heart tattoo. When his fingers find the button of Zayn’s jeans he’s stopped. “No, really, let’s take this to the bedroom”, Zayn says and Niall nods and gets up and takes Zayn’s hand in his stumbling to his bedroom. 

They stand in front of Niall’s bed just looking at each other. “Come here”, Niall says. He reaches his hand out which Zayn gladly takes. Zayn leans in first, kisses him again and turns them around before he pushes Niall onto the bed. Zayn’s weigh on top of Niall feels so good and Niall nearly loses himself in the feeling of having Zayn so close, so intimate to him. 

Zayn sucks a bruise just under Niall’s ear before he kisses, licks and sucks his way down his chest stopping at the waistband of Niall’s jeans. He gets rid of Niall’s jeans quickly as well as his own. Zayn rubs Niall through his underwear while kissing him again. “You feel so good”, he whispers as his hand slips under Niall’s boxers taking him into his hand. Zayn’s hand is dry on Niall’s cock and he hisses because it stings a bit too much. He retreats his hand and licks at his own hand before taking Niall’s cock back into his hand working his hand up and down more smoothly. Soon there’s enough of precome that makes it even better and as Zayn drapes his thumb over the slit Niall’s nearly coming from it.

“Fuck, Zayn”, Niall moans out. Zayn retreats his hand coming up and taking Niall’s bottom lip between his teeth tugging at it gently before releasing it and kissing Niall again.

Niall flips them over pressing his lips once more to Zayn’s before he takes Zayn’s boxers of, his dick slapping against his stomach. He takes Zayn’s cock into his hand and pumps it a few times before he leans forward and wraps his lips around the head his tongue caressing the underside. Niall licks up his dick and sucks at his balls that has Zayn nearly sitting up at the feeling. “God, Niall, so good”, Zayn mumbles out his hands coming up to Niall’s head his fingers carding through Niall’s hair. 

He takes more of Zayn into his mouth and as Zayn moves his hand to Niall’s cheek he pulls back again and pushes Zayn’s dick a bit to the side of his mouth so Zayn can feel it. Niall presses his tongue against the slit of Zayn’s cock before he pulls back completely. He takes his own boxers of and as his cock brushed Zayn’s he lets out a string of curses because it feels so fucking good and he never could have imagined for it to be this good. 

Zayn bucks up into him and Niall thinks he could come from this but it seems like Zayn has other plans. He lets his fingers trail down to Niall’s bum and squeezes them pulling him even harder against himself while he’s rocking up. His fingers slide down the crack of his ass and Niall moves his hips automatically back trying to get Zayn’s fingers into him. Zayn laughs. “A bit eager huh”.

“Shut up”, Niall says between kisses all over Zayn’s face. Niall leans over to his bedside table and takes out a condom and lube and sets it beside them. Zayn pushes lightly on his shoulders so Niall lies back down beside Zayn. 

Zayn squeezes a generous amount of lube onto his finger. He circles a finger around Niall’s hole feeling Niall clench. “Ssh”, his lips against Niall’s temple. Niall relaxes and Zayn pushes his first finger in. “You good”, Zayn asks and Niall nods. It takes them a while before Zayn is able to put in three of his fingers and Niall’s rocking back onto them. It’s not that Niall’s never done this before but it has been a while and he needs a while to get used to this feeling again and Zayn is patient with him it makes him want to cry. Zayn curls his fingers one more time inside of Niall before pulling them out completely, leaving Niall clenching down on nothing. 

Niall takes the condom out of Zayn’s hand. “Let me”. He pinches the top of the condom before he rolls it onto Zayn’s dick. “Hurry up”, Zayn moans out and Niall soon lays back his legs spread around Zayn’s waist. 

Zayn leans back over Niall again one hand next to Niall’s head and guides his dick into Niall with his other hand. Niall groans, throws his head back and squeezes his eyes shut trying to breathe through it. When Zayn’s fully inside of him he stays still pressing a kiss to Niall’s forehead and caressing his face. 

“Just give me a second”, Niall mumbles out his eyes still shut. Zayn just continues pressing kisses everywhere he can reach and Niall welcomes the distraction. He moves a bit and it starts to feel better. He feels full but in a good way. Zayn slowly starts to pull out before pressing back in slowly and when Niall lets out a strangled moan and his legs come up and wrap tightly around Zayn’s waist Zayn starts to move much quicker fucking into Niall. He takes Niall’s dick into his hand and tries to move it in time with his thrusts. “S-so close”, Niall grunts out. “Fuck”, Zayn moans out. “Me too”, now moving even more erratically. Niall comes first moaning out Zayn’s name as he does. Zayn thrusts into him three, four more times before he comes as well shooting into the condom and collapsing on top of Niall, completely satisfied.

Zayn lifts himself up and makes his way on his shaking legs to Niall’s bathroom. He throws away the used condom and wets a washcloth and comes back to wipe the sticky come off Niall’s belly and chest. Niall hums in appreciation. Zayn throws the cloth to the ground and slips in beside Niall taking him into his arms. Niall sleepily blinks up at him and kisses him softly before laying back down his head on Zayn’s chest and falling asleep. 

 

Niall’s the first one to wake up in the morning. Somehow during the night they changed their position. Zayn’s spooning him now and his arm around his waist makes him feel safe like it belongs there. He carefully turns around and looks at Zayn, takes him in. Niall presses his lips softly to Zayn’s before his eyes wander to the clock on his nightstand. His eyes are wide when he sees the time. “Shit, shit, shit”, he says and shaking Zayn. “Zayn, Zayn, baby please wake up”. Zayn opens his eyes slowly smiling fondly at Niall. That smile soon drops from his face when his brain progresses what Niall’s saying. “We have to be at work in half an hour”.

They jump out of bed and Niall throws Zayn some clothes to wear before they speed walk into the bathroom to brush their teeth, Zayn already having a spare one at Niall’s because they have “sleepovers” all the time. 

Niall makes them sandwiches for work quickly. He puts on his shoes and joins Zayn at the door nearly running to work. 

They make it just in time, out of breath leaning on each other. When they regain their breath they make their way to their desks.

Niall tries to concentrate on his work but he can’t his thoughts occupied with Zayn and last night. He touches his lips and he knows it’s ridiculous but he still can’t believe it. 

And it is so fucking awkward when they walk to the meeting room together, their arms brushing against each other. Niall steals glances at Zayn every so often during their meeting and he wished they would’ve had time that morning to talk about it. 

He blushes every time Zayn catches him staring and he thinks some of his colleagues notice it as well and that makes it all even worse.

Niall breathes out in relief when the day is finally over and he’s on his way back home with Zayn. Their hands brush against each other and in a moment of bravery Niall turns his hand and entwines his fingers with Zayn’s and the smile he gets in response is worth it. They’re silent the whole way back home but it’s comfortable Niall thinks. 

Back at Niall flat’s Zayn sits immediately down on the couch too exhausted to move. “I’m really not in the mood for cooking to be honest”, Niall’s says as he walks into his living room. Zayn has already his legs up on the couch his eyes closed. “You up for ordering take out, pizza maybe”, the only thing he gets in response is a soft hum. 

“Okay”, Niall says walking out of the room. 

Niall’s back before Zayn knows it and he’s nudging Zayn’s feet so he has some room on his couch to sit. Zayn lifts his legs and sits up scooting really close towards Niall. “Work was really stressful today”, Niall groans out as he lies his head back. He rubs his eyes with the ball of his hands.

He shifts a bit around to get more comfortable his hands on his thighs. Zayn moves his hand hesitantly over and blankets Niall’s hand with his own. Niall’s eyes shoot open and Zayn’s already looking at him. Zayn leans closer to Niall their breath mingling together. Their lips barely touch before the doorbell rings signaling that the pizza’s arrived.

Niall gets up, cursing under his breath for interrupting this moment. He opens the door and takes the pizza and pays the boy before closing the door again. Niall knows that the moment is over as soon as he walks into the living room with pizza in his hands. Zayn turned on the TV watching a rerun of a stupid show he loves that Niall can’t seem to be bothered to remind the name of. 

He sets the pizza in front of Zayn and places his own on his lap. He has his legs under him and he leans back against the couch. They watch the rest of the show in silence. Niall looks up at Zayn more often than not but not once is Zayn turning his head to look at him.

\---

It goes like this. Zayn spends so much more time at Niall’s flat and he sleeps over most of the nights and somehow more of his things find their way into Niall’s flat. They sleep together not even having sex and somehow it’s so much more than that.

It is one afternoon when Niall’s alone in his flat with Zayn being still at work that he realizes what happens. No matter where he looks he sees Zayn’s things. There’s not one room or corner where not at least one thing of Zayn’s is. 

Zayn comes home two hours later. Niall just finished setting the table and Zayn comes in a gives him a quick kiss on the cheek before he sits down. They eat in silence for a while until Zayn speaks up. “Work is really boring without you, you know”.

“I’ll be back tomorrow”, Niall laughs. He swallows loudly before he speaks up again. “So, um, Zayn”, he begins and said boy is looking up at him, spaghetti hanging half out of his mouth. Niall laughs again as Zayn tries to get all of his food into his mouth. “So, I noticed something today”. Zayn furrows his eyebrows but nods his head for Niall to continue. “Pretty much all of your stuff is already in my flat”.

Zayn’s eyes widen. He takes a sip of his glass. “Yeah, Liam mentioned it to me the other day”, he gets out. “Like, I think, we missed the moment where you moved in here”, Niall laughs and Zayn soon joins him. “So, you’re not mad”, Zayn asks. “No”, Niall replies standing up. “Why would I”? He rounds the table and stops in front of Zayn who sits back a bit so Niall has enough room to sit down in his lap. “So you’d be okay with me moving in”, Zayn asks holding onto Niall’s waist.

“You already moved into my flat”, Niall reminds, his arms around Zayn’s neck. “Yeah, well, was just checking”, Zayn responds leaning his forehead against the side of Niall’s face.

Niall lightly scratches at the nape of Zayn’s neck. “Niall”, Zayn begins again and Niall feels the nervousness radiating off Zayn’s body, his fingers tightening on Niall’s hips. Niall turns his head and looks into Zayn’s eyes. “There’s something else I’ve wanted to tell you for a while actually”. 

“What is it”, Niall asks and their faces are so close that their lips nearly brush when one of them speaks and it takes all of Niall’s will power to not lean in the last few inches. 

“I love you”, Zayn whispers. “I’ve loved you for quite some time now”. Niall leans in the last inches and presses his lips against Zayn’s. “I love you”, Niall murmurs between kisses.

Niall stays in Zayn’s lap for the rest of dinner. They quickly clean the kitchen where there’s more kisses involved than really necessary. “I’m going to take a shower before joining you in the living room, yeah”, Zayn says hugging Niall from behind kissing his neck softly. “I might join you”, Niall replies turning around in his arms. “You know, to save water and all”, Zayn laughs out loud, taking Niall’s hand and dragging him to the bathroom. 

Zayn’s back is pressed against Niall’s chest as they stand in Niall’s small shower. He kisses along Zayn’s shoulder while his hands move around Zayn’s chest and stomach. Zayn takes the shampoo in his hands, turns around and massages it into Niall’s hair. “Mm I think I could get used to this”, he says closing his eyes and really enjoying the moment. Somehow it is the most intimate thing he’s ever done with someone and it makes his heart flutter. 

He washes the shampoo out before he washes Zayn’s hair. Zayn’s a bit touchier with him. His hands travel from Niall’s shoulders down his back to his ass where squeezes them making Niall yelp. He slaps Zayn’s chest glaring at him though he can’t hide his smile, so Zayn kisses him. 

Niall hands Zayn a towel and grabs one for him. Zayn begins drying Niall’s hair before he joins him under the towel and kisses him when Niall least expects it. “I really love you”, Zayn whispers before he takes the towel away and wraps it around his waist. 

Zayn walks out of the bathroom leaving a flustered Niall behind who has to grip the sides of the sink. He looks at himself and can’t stop smiling and that’s all because of Zayn, because Zayn makes him so, so happy.

He walks back into the living room, Zayn’s already there lying comfortably on the couch. Niall joins him by lying on top of Zayn. “Hey, there”, Zayn says his arms coming up around Niall. “Hey”, Niall replies, placing a quick kiss on Zayn’s lips.

“So what do you think about moving the rest of your stuff over here next week”, Niall asks his head on Zayn’s chest so he can avoid looking at Zayn while he suggests it. Zayn places his hand on the back of Niall’s neck and makes him look up at him. “I’d like that”, he whispers before leaning in and kissing Niall again. 

Niall thinks he really would like this to be his life for the rest of his life. Zayn makes him so incredibly happy and the butterflies in his stomach feel really nice. He can feel Zayn’s heart beating against his chest where he has his hand and knowing it is because of him and that he has the same impact on Zayn than he has on him makes it even better and he knows they have a long, long time ahead of them filled with love and laughter.


End file.
